30 Day Love Mojo Challenge: Week One: Bust the Good Girl Blues

From Stacy Murphy, certified intimacy coach.

"Good Girl Syndrome" is sabotaging your relationships.

Four Symptoms:

1. You don't believe you are good enough, so you have to do, and be a certain way in order to be loved and accepted.
2. You are critical, envious or jealous of other women
3. You fear speaking your mind and expressing your needs
4. You have inhibitions, guilt, shame or awkwardness around intimacy and sex.

The first step is to take a personal inventory of which GGS is causing the biggest problem (all of them, but especially number 1).

What story/belief is this telling you about yourself?  Believing I am not good enough as I am holds me back due to fear of rejection, and it can cause me to behave in unauthentic ways and come off as awkward and needy.  

How has this belief affected your self-confidence?  And how has it affected your relationships?  Oh man.  This is why I self-sabatoge.  This is why I accept and cling to shitty relationships.  It's better than nothing, right?

What is the origin of that belief?  No comment.

Who did you learn/get this belief from?  TV.  Society.  Family.  Myself.

If you were to let go of this Good Girl Syndrome, how would your life improve?  Maybe I wouldn't talk myself out of accepting when people are flirting with me.  Maybe I would flirt back.  I would probably have less anxiety about what other people think of me.

And why is shifting your belief about this Good Girl Syndrome important to you?  I don't want to feel like shit about myself forever.  Or be doomed to be alone.

What is a new, empowering story about yourself that supports what you want, and who you are now?  What new possibilities exist? I am who I am in this moment, the sum of my experiences.  I am exactly who I need to be right now, and I have the freedom to develop and change for my own happiness, not anyone else's, should I so choose.  Confidence in who I am at this moment will attract like-minded quality people.

Activity:  For 7 Days, you are NOT going to complain about anything. If nagging thoughts come in your head, stop yourself in mid thoughts and quickly move them to what you desire to manifest.